First day back at work after Sweden

I really didn't want to go back to work after Sweden. Felt something had changed and wasn't entirely sure that I was really happy at Artists Harbour. I was really pissed off when I got there. The window displays have had some handy work done and now they just look like a bloody junk shop - selling tat! When we first opened the gallery we had a shop display expert come round and one of the things he said was that there should be no more than 2 large pictures in any one given window display. Now there must be atleast 6, together with crap cards leaning over them...GGGGrrrrrrr!! It just looks so unprofessional! Leon's argument when I told him I wasn't happy was that we need as much stock on display as possible! But you take away the expense of a quality painting by dumping it next to our cheaper range. Can't argue with the boss though!

Charlie popped into the gallery in the morning saying he would see me later. I hoped that meant lunch as I hadn't bought anything yet. He called later and said he'd meet me at 12.45. We went to Ha Ha bar and ordered a steak sandwich and a bottle of red wine. Now you know that I can't drink during the day, but I was so pissed off that i thought 'Fuck it!'. Charlie is a great guy, kind of like a father figure...although he implies differently.! He has fantastic stories to tell and is helping me get through all this emotional shit. It is good because he has gone through what I am experiencing now. There is light at the end of the tunnel for me. He says I am going through a procedure which will continue to change everything else I do; job, living location - everything I do now will have a knock on effect and get better and better. He says I have grown in confidence in just the last 3 weeks alone. This is encouraging. Charlie has worked in advertising for 25 years and has made some great contacts. He says when I know what I want for sure in 6 months, he can organise interviews with top companies. We shall see.

I have left this too many days to remember anymore now. But just to say it was the first night in over 10 days that I spent in the same house. Mark felt very awkward. Indeed I just feel like I need to be out of there ASAP for both our sakes.